What should I do ? I’m a straight woman married to a man, with two school-aged kids. I’ve been slowly coming to a “should I stay or should should I go” point in my marriage. Basically, I feel starved for affection and sex and my husband is very critical and irritable. I feel at best like an irritating roommate and at worst like his least favorite coworker. I’d reached a point where I was planning to ask him to pursue either couples therapy or an amicable mediated divorce — his choice because I think the discord in our home is hurting the kids and I just can’t get through to him.

Here’s the kicker: I wanted to wait a few months to give myself time to reflect on this decision and to quietly grieve the potential end of the relationship. However, my husband suddenly found out that he has a job opportunity that will lead to travel all over the world, with moves every couple of years. He thinks this is a great opportunity to see the world and that it would be an unforgettable experience for our kids. I told him that my condition for going would be working on our marriage first. That’s just lead to more fighting. It’s clear now he’s unwilling to provide me with more emotional support and affection. As for sex, he says he’s “just not that interested.”

In the meantime he’s constantly talking about how great this would be for the kids. It’s clear he wants me to come to facilitate bringing our children along, not because he wants to go on this adventure with me. He talks about it constantly though and the pressure is making me feel panicked. I don’t want to prevent him from taking this job, but I’m tired of feeling like the bad guy for sticking to my guns. He can ask me to uproot my life for this job but he severely bristles when I ask for him to initiate sex with me. He’s making me feel like I’m crazy for not being completely on board with his new life plan.

How can I get through to him that while I’d love to see the world with someone who treats me like they love me, I don’t think our marriage is going to survive anywhere if he doesn’t stop taking me for granted. What should I do,